Cyber-The Experience

When I finished my last story, The Unlocked Door , I wanted to write about cybersex in an informative way.

Cybersex is defined as:
A virtual sex encounter in which two or more persons connected remotely via a computer network send one another sexually explicit messages describing a sexual experience. It is a form of role-playing in which the participants pretend they are having actual sexual relations. In one iteration, this fantasy sex is accomplished by the participants describing their actions and responding to their chat partners in a mostly written form designed to stimulate their own sexual feelings and fantasies.

"Pretty self-explanatory and dry wouldn’t you say?"

Additionally:
The quality of a cybersex encounter typically depends upon the participants' abilities to evoke a vivid, visceral mental picture in the minds of their partners. Imagination and suspension of disbelief are also critically important.

"This is what helps me practice my writing and gives more insight into what people’s fantasies consist of, it’s a wonderful buffet!"

There are always two sides to a story:
Advantages to ‘cybering’ include:
Cybersex can satisfy some sexual desires without the risk of sexually transmitted disease or pregnancy, it is a physically safe way for young people to experiment with sexual thoughts and emotions. Additionally, people with long-term ailments (including HIV) can engage in cybersex as a way to safely achieve sexual gratification without putting their partners at risk.
Cybersex allows "real-life" partners who are physically separated to continue to be sexually intimate. It can function to sustain the sexual dimension of a relationship in which the partners see each other only infrequently face to face.
Cybersex has also been used in therapy to help those who are too shy or are unsure of how to (re)enter the dating and sexual scene. For example, some therapists have clients practice flirting skills and rehearse how to ask for what they want sexually in chat rooms.

Disadvantages to ‘cybering’ include:
While it does not involve physical contact, critics claim that the powerful emotions involved can cause marital stress, especially when cybersex culminates in an Internet romance. In several known cases Internet adultery became the grounds for which a couple divorced. Therapists report a growing number of patients addicted to this activity[, a form of both Internet addiction and sexual addiction, with the standard problems associated with addictive behavior.

I started ‘cybering’ more than 10 years ago (I got my first computer in 1995). I’ve been smart enough to not get into any trouble with it. I have met a couple of men via my cybering, including two relationships that lasted over 2 years. As I moved onto blogging about 4 years ago I included it as part of writing repertoire. I’m very interested in hearing from my readers about any experiences that you want to share or any opinions you have, positive or negative, about the whole idea. I’m absolutely fascinated by the whole phenomena.

If you’d like to read more of my stories inspired by cybersex see the links below.

• Sex News Sunday #8
• CJ’s Thoughts on Fidelity
• Tell Me
• Objectification and Feminism
• A Quick Bite to Eat
• Cyber Foreplay

There is much more, be sure to use the search blog feature and type in cybersex